Please Stop Comparing The Mediocre NY Giants Defense To My Libido
I’m not one to be defensive. I’m not even one to be offensive. Despite what people may believe after my infamous 2013 outburst about how everyone from Oklahoma wear socks with sandals. I stand by it, even though it lost me that Hanes sponsorship.
However, there has been a recent trend that I’d like to talk about: people comparing the NFL’s lowest-ranked New York Giants defense to my sex drive.
I know that you may find it a humorous, or even apt comparison. However, that doesn’t justify it by any means.
The New York Giants defense, unlike my sexual desires, weas hampered with injuries throughout the season. Additionally, because of the complete lack of a run game by the Giants offense, the defense was on the field much too often.
And so to Al Michaels, Trent Dilfer, and all the other sportscasters that may be making this unfair comparison I say this: I will hit you with a cease and desist so fast it will make your eyebrows fall off.
Yeah, I said it.
CC Phto Courtesy Of Wikipedia/wiki/List_of_New_York_Giants_seasons